Motherhood and being Cultured!

5 Nov


This post is dedicated to the one year Blogiversary of one of the most happening parenting communities, World Moms Blog.

I was asked to write about Motherhood relating to our Indian culture and link up with the World Moms Blog . In India I would say there are at at least 50 different cultures for every aspect. And the same and more apply to motherhood. Having said that, this post has nothing to do with any of the  specific 50 different cultures of India.

For me motherhood simply means worshipping my mother’s motherhood. I should say I have not much vocally appreciated her as much as I should be not only for bringing me up, but doing everything else and more for my son, her grandson.


Sculpture - "Motherhood" at St.Anne convent in northern Kentucky.

This is where it began. When I was pregnant I contacted Hepatitis-A, a viral infection and was down with jaundice. It was not specifically life threatening or problematic for the baby in womb (because of the placental barrier), but we all were so stressed mentally and emotionally. This was approximately during the 22nd week. I was working 12 hours a day, designing the supposedly love of my life, car electronics. During that period I was living, 350 miles away from home.

The gynecologist and gastroentrologist advised complete bed rest until the day of delivery. I was very upset hearing this. I pleaded, I coaxed, that I work at least after a month’s rest. I was feeling completely fit and fine. But for whatever reasons God chose, I was back at my parents’ home relaxing and enjoying all the remaining 5 to 6 months of pregnancy. I was eating home cooked food by the world’s greatest cook (mom), being pampered and cared and just plain killing time reading books, researching pregnancy and stuff over the internet. The DDH used to visit me over the weekends at my parents’ place. [**I have not really thanked him enough for letting me stay on at my parents’ place indefinitely**]. And life was benevolent indeed.  

And then, one fine day I delivered a healthy happy crying baby boy and all was fine again in this mama’s world.

And I went back to work when DDS was 6 months old.

No day care, said the DDH. No nannies. No nothing. I was devastated. Apparently the DDH was a great fan of attachment parenting, and well, neither did I have the heart to send him to a day care to strangers. I mean, yes, I know there are so many wonderful care centers and I am not being judgmental. Having said that, I just felt I needed my little boy to be with people he knew, he was biologically related to.

So, super woman aka my mom, aka my son’s grand mom stepped in to the rescue. She traveled 350 miles away from her home, stayed with us, away from her husband and her son and took care of DDS while I worked away ‘happily’ at the car electronics typing away software codes for the automatic power steering.

Now, my dad visited us during the weekend to be with his wife, my mom and with all of us, his family. And oh, my brother sacrificed being with his mom too, because he was just entering college, and needed her emotional support. But the neediest was the baby, so my mom devoted her entire time, energy and thoughts to baby. We stayed in this arrangement for at least 5 years when we decided I would quit work because mom had to go back home, for her own personal reasons.

But the point is, my mom put up with a 25-year-old, grown up, pregnant, moody, lazy, physically unwell woman (me) for half a year, an ignorant mom (me) for another half-year and then she stayed away from her family, her husband and her son for 5 full years. I can not really thank my father and brother enough for letting me have her fully. She did all this for her grandson. Her idea of motherhood which can not be defined in any words except by retelling this story is just my idea of motherhood.

Culture is also refinement, culture is also being civilized, culture, my father always says, is doing what is best and correct for the moment and living life the way, God would later say, Ah, I am proud of you, my child. Isnt that how culture must have evolved in any society?

So, I am blessed to have parents who are cultured and who tried their best to imbibe that in my brother and me.

And this post celebrates that woman, who is the best mother in the whole world.

Some day, I hope my son says that too.


This article is part of the World Moms Blog Link-up

This article is part of the World Moms Blog Link-up

Go ahead, click the above button and view all posts written by mothers all around the globe participating in the World Moms Blog link up! I encourage the reader to also participate by writing your own post under the topic, “Motherhood, culture and myself” and show your support for the most celebrated feeling, “motherhood” by ‘liking’ and commenting on my and all posts.


12 Responses to “Motherhood and being Cultured!”

  1. Tatter Scoops November 5, 2011 at 9:58 am #

    Oh this is such a heartfelt and beautiful post. Thank you for sharing your mother with us. I got teary eyed reading this. What a lovely tribute to your mother’s love and devotion to her family. I too was on a bed rest for a whole month from severe preeclampsia but I had no one to care for me except for my ex husband. My parents couldn’t come to the US to help out, they didn’t even see my son until I came home to Indonesia. Such a blessing to have your mother and your father’s support. Precious!

    • The Alchemist November 5, 2011 at 4:14 pm #

      Your own post is so delightful. Your love is reflected in it.

      Thanks for your very kind comments. Yes, mothers are amazing people, arent they.

  2. rakhikankane November 5, 2011 at 10:55 am #

    Interesting blog…

  3. engine111 November 5, 2011 at 11:54 am #

    I have not much of an idea about motherhood since I’m not a mother, but I definitely think one’s love for one’s mother,however pure,noble and selfless,is never going to compensate for the sacrifices she makes.

    Good work. 🙂

    • The Alchemist November 5, 2011 at 4:15 pm #

      I hear you. So true. A mother is an embodiment of sacrifice. But she never thinks of it as sacrifice which makes it all the more so precious. Thank you for your beautiful comment.

  4. Asta Burrows November 5, 2011 at 5:53 pm #

    Mothers are great aren’t they! But I must admit that I didn’t fully appreciate my own mother until I was a mother myself… Like you – I just hope that my lad will one day say the same thing about me 🙂

    • The Alchemist November 7, 2011 at 10:06 am #

      Just that one sentence from our kid(s) and perhaps, our journey as a mother would seem complete… 🙂

  5. Jennifer Burden November 7, 2011 at 4:02 am #

    Sweet, sweet post! 🙂 Thank you for sharing your story — it sounds like your family is willing to do whatever it takes! I’m so glad that all went well in the end with your pregnancy. What a difficult time for you.

    Alchemist, thanks for linking up from India with World Moms Blog!!! 🙂

    Jen 🙂

    • The Alchemist November 7, 2011 at 9:53 am #

      Its a pleasure Jen.

      Its an honor to be part of World Moms Blog which is so oriented towards social good.

  6. Shalini December 22, 2011 at 1:41 pm #

    You have thanked everybody a million! and that too with all beautiful words!

    • The Alchemist March 8, 2012 at 9:46 am #

      Shalini, motherhood brings out the most beautiful in all of us, I guess 🙂

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